Dwelling on the Past

Life can be hard sometimes. It is not always the rosy image we pictured. But the beauty of Life is that we have varied experiences – both good and bad. At times when it is good it is extremely good, and sometimes when it is bad it follows the old adage – when it rains it pours.

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Some of these experiences have a way to stay in our mind for a long time. Particularly the wrong/negative ones. Speaking from experience, I know many such ones that still linger in the back of my mind and confronts me if triggered. But the good thing is time heals everything and I have moved on. But it is not easy and sometimes you lose hope. You may really wonder is there really a silver lining? Yes, always remember this too shall pass. But till then these are a reminder of why we do dwell in the past and how to let go:

  • Resentment – Most often that not, we resent the fact that we allowed something awful to happen to us. We are presented with two choices: to either accept what is happening or to fight and make thing better. Unfortunately for a long time, we accept things as it is and it is only when it’s too late we realize we should have opted for the latter. This realization creates a resentment within us and we punish ourselves by reminding us of it constantly.
  • No closure – One of the common reasons we dwell on the past is because there was no proper ending to that relation. Maybe you parted ways without saying anything or there was still things left unsaid or it ended in a fight. Maybe you have regrets or you want to take back what you said or didn’t do.
  • Addiction – Memories have a way to connect us to our emotions. Sometimes it reminds us of the time we were our happiest. How certain things used to happen, how much you enjoyed at those times, what a carefree time it was and many such factors. It reminds us how those things are no longer true and we hold onto that feeling as much and as long as possible. We want to keep reliving those moments which makes us forget to live in the present.

So how do we let go? Read on:

  • Distraction – A useful technique. Keep your mind occupied – with anything except whatever reminds you of your past. Start a new hobby, learn a new skill or do volunteer work.
  • Exercise – A great way to stay in shape and let all the stress, tension to release. It will help you feel and look like a million bucks. Meditation is especially beneficial. Take time out to clear your mind and feel blissful.
  • Forgive – Finding closure is important. You have to able to forgive yourself and others for whatever happened. Even if it is your fault or not, remind yourself that you are worthy of something better. Forgiving the other person doesn’t mean you are weak or they didn’t do anything wrong but it will help you to see the bigger picture so you can move on. Keep your focus on you and take your time to look back and see everything objectively. Always remember when one door closes another opens.


Lastly, Everyday Tarot blog helps readers find a way to connect to themselves and move on from any baggage they carry. The Tarot is always there to help.


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