Relationships are hard and we all know it. But to fall in love? Why is it harder to meet someone and still yet, fall in love? What is it that is holding us back? Why do we find it difficult to find the right partner? Why are we breaking up every so often? Everywhere I look, people want to be in a relationship or complain they can’t find the right partner. Everybody wants a connection, to have emotional support but yet when it comes to finding the right person they back out. why? Based on my experience, these are my two cents. So are you still single? if yes, please read on:
- Living in the past
Yes. One of the biggest reason we may be holding out on opportunities is because we are still hung up on our past relations. Maybe it didn’t end well or maybe it was one of the best relationships we ever had, the happiest we ever were but now it’s no more. What you may want is the feeling you had when you were together rather than to actually be with that person but not all experiences are the same. What if you gave another person a chance? Maybe you had a bad experience and are afraid it will happen again, but you wouldn’t know till you take the chance, right? Also this time you are wiser than before and you can leave sooner. And more important stop expecting it to be like the previous one. Isn’t life meant to be an experience? why stop at just one?
One thing about love is how confusing it can be. But what is even more confusing is to figure out what we truly want – from ourselves and our partner. Maybe you want to date someone who is fun and full of enthusiasm but after date 3 you are exhausted from their energy. Or you want one who is successful and financially stable but they hardly have time for you. So decide what you want in a relationship and what you can compromise on. In the end, it is your happiness that matter which will enable a long term relationship.
- Expectation v. Reality
Want to date someone who looks like a celebrity? The woman with a perfect figure? Someone Independent but funny? One of the things media has created havoc with is how an ideal partner should look or be. Nobody is perfect – physically or emotionally. Everybody comes with some kind of baggage. It is up to us know what we can deal with and what has to go. One has to be realistic in choosing their partner. For example you maybe dating someone who looks like a supermodel but what if she is snooty like hell? Get me?
A very cliched and old phrase to use, I know, but it is important to use it here. Waiting for the right person to come almost never works. If you want someone then you gotta make it happen! If you don’t put in any effort then how can you magically expect the right person to come along? Especially in today’s day and age where we have the opportunity to meet and be in so many places. Don’t limit yourself. Yet others have the weird excuse of been busy – let me tell you something – You can never be too busy to do something you find important. So make time!
This can go in two ways. Either you have no confidence or you have too much of it. The right amount of confidence is a turn on for anyone. But if you put too much of yourself out there anyone will run miles away from you. Sometimes we do find a little nervousness charming so don’t hold back because you aren’t confident or shy. You don’t have to do anything heroic – just be yourself. Who would have thought, huh?
- Iphone 7 or Iphone 7s
One of the worst mistakes you can do is to wait for something/ someone better to come along. If you are constantly searching for a better model then that’s all that you will be doing – searching! I personally know someone who is currently doing something similar and he is turning 30 this year. Yeah. Now am not saying its too late or anything but such an attitude will get you nowhere.
- Commitment issues
Sometimes the most basics of reason will do it which is you are afraid of committing yourself to another person. You are afraid of the responsibilities and the choices you may have to make. But that is true of any relationship not just romantic! While every relationship requires some compromise and adjustments, you don’t have to completely change for anybody. Take a leap of faith and see what happens. What if you truly like it?
Lastly, Everyday Tarot blog provides you with a holistic view of your strengths and weakness and find answers to your problems. The Tarot is always there to help.